this one goes out to the big dog daddies at dealbreaker!
dealbreaker: your wallet chain
you are a grown-ass man and you’re afraid you’re going to lose your wallet? if you’re afraid of losing your wallet, how did you ever lose your virginity? if you have to keep your money on a chain, how am i ever going to spend it?
what? it’s a relic from when you “used to go to hardcore shows”? you must be kidding. have fun with your xedgex friends. i’ll be over here with this other guy who can sit down without first removing the chain mail protruding from his ass.
